There was a dreamland in my head where I wanted everything to be peaceful and sincere. I wanted there to be calm and quiet. I only wanted to feel the waves crashing on the shore. I only wanted to feel the weight of the waves breaking over me. I only wanted to feel burned by the sun and cut from the scrapes of an adventure. I wanted to see blue water. I wanted to sink in it and hear the nothingness. I wanted to relax, and expand, and float in this water. I wanted to grow like the palm tree or the perfectly cultivated grass. I wanted to grow green and healthy and fresh. I wanted to flourish like the bird of paradise blooming in my front yard. I wanted to spread my wings. I wanted to find the calm then cleanse myself of all that came before. I wanted to be anew then grow like the tallest of trees. I needed calm so I could grow.