Noga No More

When I first started...well, let me start from the beginning. I was a yoga skeptic. I was the opposite of interested. Like sure, there were health benefits and people claimed, "spiritual snd emotional" benefits. But looking over photos, I thought, what will stretching, breathing, and that weird poses, really do for my abs or ass. I'm here to work out so pass the jump rope, burpees, and adjustable weights my way and get this zen shit out of here. 

So needless to say, when I moved to Venice Beach, a kind of yogi Mecca, I was less than enthused when everyone would tell me how yoga would change my life.  

I first started when a friend was in teacher training and needed to practice instructing someone. I said, yes, because I may judge but never say no to new experiences. 

I discovered that I was quick to learn this whole yoga thing and actually had a lot of fun during our private teachings. My body was contorted into new ways that felt nice and I learned to tuck my sits bone.  

So, I went to my friend, Caley's class! Not only was there a great sense of community but a real sense of love. As I started to practice more and more, I felt soreness in new muscles, felt pride in my arm balances, continued and extended my flexibility, but what I wasn't expecting was a sense of spirituality.  

Sometimes I would whell up and let go of emotional baggage, my anxiety dropped significantly, and I felt more open to and in control of my life. I learned when the physical meets the spiritual, it is a powerful thing. 

I remember being in NYC, home for Christmas, and having felt stressed over holidays, money, a fight with a friend, and family pressures. I was begging for a class. I went online and found the closest studio I could. I remember feeling clarity and sweet relief when the class wrapped. I had it all under control! 

After a few months and tough times, it almost hurt to go. Being so open hearted and the act of working on myself hurt so I has slowly stopped practicing. 

A few months later, I find myself a ball of stress, anxiety, and confusion. I realize the change and loss, I feel from stopping my practice. I realized to help myself I have to step back on my mat like I intend to do. Like they say, the bravest thing you can do is show up!