My best friend is on the other side of the world right now. The time difference makes it pretty hard for us to always be able to chat and have solid conversations. We have been through a lot over the years and we have our silly habits and our funny ways. Her birthday only passed a few days ago and I genuinely feel a bit depressed that I couldn't be there to help make it the best day ever.
Every friendship is different but I think you can be your weirdest self with you best friend and hopefully, my list of experiences with my bestie resonates.
1. Fighting over nothing. I have to say the ultimate test of your friendship is getting into a fight and not speaking to each other for almost a year just to end up in a diner crying over how much you love each other. True story. When we got back together, it was nothing as if nothing had ever happened and it was because in the grand scheme, nothing had. The fight was ultimately down to life stressors and projecting on the ones we loved the most...neither of us felt like this was something to cling to even though it took us some time (mostly because we were both afraid to reach out and email addresses had changed).
2. Send each other naked selfies. No joke. When hormones have taken over my body, I will literally show her the comparison of "the ladies". When one of us is trying to determine if we lost or gained weight, send nudes. When one of us is really just feelin' ourselves, special delivery. I don't know how "normal" this is but it makes us laugh, smile, and feel free.
3. Appreciate our differences. She's essentially a Kerry Washington, Zoe Saldana, Beyonce baby and I could easily resent her for her supermodel legs, perfect complexion, and gravity defying breasts BUT instead, I love her for it. Alternatively, she's always saying that she wishes she had my hips, bum, and waist. When it comes to our personalities, we couldn't be more different. I'm always early while she's still deciding what pants are clean. She always able to go through the flow while I'm trying to remember my anxiety breathing exercises. We celebrate what makes us different. Maybe it's all the naked selfies.
4. Our general rule is "be good to each other but don't expect too much". I know that sounds very strange but it's actually really perfect. We live in different countries with extremely different lifestyles so it's hard for me to remember every exam she has or for her to remember every gig that I get. We always get the gist of those things though. That's kind of where the "don't expect too much" bit comes in. We're busy people. If something happens though, forget it...we're on the next flight (if our bank accounts allow it). We will be on 3 am phone calls for every and any life upset that comes out way. It's pretty amazing.
5. There is no emotion that we can't experience together. Good time friends are a dime a dozen but who's there when you're crying, hyperventilating, or way too drunk? Those are the people you want. We met working at a restaurant and I would cover shifts if she was hungover or having a tough day and she would cover mine if my then boyfriend was in town or I was having a panic attack. Don't worry, it's not all crying and covering each other's shifts. Mostly, it's smiley poop emojis, cuddles, and laughing so hard that people wonder about our mental health.
6. We're really proud of each other. Neither of us have made it in our careers YET but we both celebrate the bravery it takes to commit to the lives we mapped out for ourselves. I can't imagine getting my doctorate or having people trust me with the mental development of their children because it's terrifying. I'm always so proud that she has the bravery to do it. I know she admires that my life path is unconventional and half that time I don't know what I'm doing. Every single one of my victories, she celebrates and vice versa.