A Small Guide to Friendship In Your 20's

Friendship can be a bumpy road. But as we all discover and change over the fundamental years that are our 20's, it becomes even more challenging to navigate the ups and downs. The best thing you can do is be a part of your and other people's journeys (judgement free). 

1. Expect everyone to change.

After college, you get to form the life you want for yourself but sometimes people will change into someone you think you don't know anymore. The truth is the core of the friend you love is still in there even if they went from your sorority's president to living in a free love commune. The most important tool to keep that friendship is accepting that even if what makes them happy isn't something you understand, you should welcome it and them with open arms. 

2. Everything feels really tough.

The career you thought you'd love in finance may be leaving you depressed and unfulfilled. Maybe your friends don't understand. Maybe they don't see why you would leave a high paying job for something else. Maybe they don't understand why you would think about leaving a safe situation without a passionate dream for something else. Well, just give yourself and everyone else a break. You will find your way even if it takes time. You will find it. Allow your friends to not understand but know that they are probably going through a personal battle themselves. Maybe it's the lack of the safety net or the harsh reality of the world but everything feels really tough in your twenties. 

3. Acknowledge envy.

Friends are going to have nicer apartments. Friends will go on their dream vacations. Friends will make more money than you. It's okay to be jealous. But it's not okay to not be happy for them.  Acknowledge that little pit in your stomach that shouts "Shit! I want that too!" or "That's not fair." Life isn't fair and if you don't experience happiness for your loved ones then you'll not only experience unhappiness yourself but really distance yourselves from sharing in the positivity of the live's of others. Let it serve as a kick in the bum to get the thing you want. Life doesn't owe you anything and I bet they didn't get what they wanted by watching others get something. They prioritized it. 

4. Welcome significant others with open arms.

Nothing tears friendships aren't than being hostile towards a friend's boyfriend or girlfriend. Okay, so maybe they aren't the best at remembering anniversaries or calling back but that isn't your battle to fight. All that is going to happen is you'll created an awkward situation for your friend. Even if you feel they are making the biggest mistake, you have to let them.

5. Don't deal with bullshit.

The truth is that you can cut people out of your life. If you aren't happy with how someone is treating you even after you've discussed it then move on. This world is going to be filled with so many journeys and adventures. Focus on what's in front of you and the people who truly make you happy. I bet your life will significantly improve. 

6. Sticking together doesn't mean being together.

You know the saying, "If you love something let it go..." My some of my best friends live across the country currently and soon, it will be across the world. That's okay because luckily, we have FaceTime. It keeps us connected. We may not be there for each other for the little dramas but we always have each other's back. Whatever happens in each other's lives, we are rooting each other on from the other side of that screen.